8-10^th July 2016

Myself and my Karl Pilkington companion, Jonathan, arrive in Jaipur to another barrage of tuk tuk drivers. We hop on one, agree a price of 150 (very reasonable for the distance) and hope for the best. The driver was the nicest I’ve ever had, he was very smiley, told a lot of jokes and was in good spirits. He showed us his book which had comments in from past travellers. Jonathan kept trying to find holes in his story but it was a thoroughly enjoyable ride.

Snippets the driver said:

> What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I-DEER.

Brilliant!

Then an extra passenger appeared alongside us.

At first I thought all the gated communities were to segregate the rich from the poor. Now I think maybe it’s just to keep the cows, bulls and goats out.

He then pulled out the big guns:

> If you have sixty (six-tee) cups on a table and one falls over how many do you have?

Only 5 because in India we have TEA cups so you started with six tea cups.

I love this guy!

When we arrived I was so pleased with the service I gave him 300 rupees. Jonathan was shocked. He told me we’re not splitting the full amount which for a grand total of £3 I found even more hilarious than the jokes. Such a great morning! After all, having being essentially mugged by the tuk tuk drivers in Delhi, I thought it only right that the first decent driver should get more extra than what they got from me. Seems only right!

The next day I’m back on my organised tour. The chap was delightful from the outset. “You want tea, coffee” he would ask. When I told him I didn’t carry a lot of money around and wanted to tip him later he just dismissed it and said “I get, you my guest. You must have tea now” and before I knew it there’s a lovely masala tea in front of me. Finally, Jaipur is the India I wanted India to be.

We went off to go see the pink city and various areas, as well as another palace. All of which seem to have summer and winter palaces due to the extreme weather in India. After a couple of lovely photos we were on our way again.

As lovely as the chap was, nothing was going to stop another pit stop at another high quality shop to get me to spend money. This time it was a textile warehouse which was surprisingly informative.

This chap showed me how block printing worked after I asked him about his job which was very kind indeed. Then the sales people had me back in their mits and took me upstairs when I said a rug wouldn’t fit in my bag. We had a look at clothes and all sorts. The materials weren’t as nice as he purported them to be as I really enjoy wearing suits and could feel and see the difference. However, there were some lovely ties, cufflinks and pocket squares with unique patterns that I just had to get. They do the finishing touches for you there and then so they really feel like yours and it’s a lovely touch.

Lunch time! We end up in a small café with no one around which made me uneasy and didn’t speak much for the quality (or safety from Delhi Belly). However, on receiving the food and immediately tucking in, I was pleasantly surprised. The thali was great!

On the way back we saw the building with a thousand windows.

Supposedly built so that some princess could watch the street activity from any angle that she wished. /Cough/ High maintenance /cough/.

Next was one of my favourite stops of all which was the observatory. This is an outdoor space with mathematical instruments which tell you the time, date and horoscope of the moment based on the sun’s rays. It was all very clever and super interesting to see its accuracy also!

Next door is the museum. Perhaps I misunderstood the guide when he said “let’s check out the guns”.

Back at the hostel it was time to chill out and read a book for a while.

I had a surprise waiting for me though because when I went to order some food in to the hostel I was told someone had been ringing for me for the last few days. Ringing for me? In India? Sorry, what? Turns out Manilla, from the previous hostel, wanted to get in touch to say goodbye properly because we didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. It was the most adorable moments of my entire time in India. I got through to her and we chatted and caught up and said goodbye properly.

What a great human being!

Now. Back to chilling out.

Before I knew it I was back on a bus to Delhi so I could head to the airport. I bought some sweets and what I assumed was grape juice on the way. Only it wasn’t grape juice because that would be too obvious in India.

What else would you think it was? Would you assume it was lemon juice mixed with black pepper and a mixture of spices? No? That’s what it was. It found its way to the bin quicker than I could spit it out of my mouth. It definitely wasn’t for me!

Finding out the lotus temple and various other things were already shut in Delhi meant that I headed straight to the airport. A good 8 hours or so early. Normally this wouldn’t matter so much but the airport wouldn’t let me through until 5 hours before. Luckily, I got talking to this great woman in the queue in front and had someone to pass the time with. Also in our favour was the fact that I could get into one of the lounges before we passed through to the airport and it also allowed me a plus one. So, being so early turned out to be such a bad thing in the end!

Saying goodbye after having barely known each other but getting on so well is a strange thing. We exchanged email addresses though and went our separate ways.

A nice end to India!